Alani:
why do sororities get all dolled up to go eat with each other?
Alani:
i'm in the union and they are setting up some dinner in the cabaret
Me:
oh so it was rush week here the other night
Me:
and i got on a campus bus to go to the gym, in my dirty ol sweats
Me:
and every seat was full, there were people standing
Me:
and every single one of them was a sorority girl.
identical.
Me:
ugg boots + tights + slinky black dress + pearls + red or black peacoat + overmoussed hair
Me:
it was freaky
Alani:
well at least the breed is consistent
Me:
120lbs 5ft 4
Me:
white
Me:
blonde (or brown with blonde streaks)
Alani:
right i see 3 of those and 4 solid brunettes and 20 black peacoats
Me:
anyway you get the picture
Alani:
i just dont get the point of getting dressed up to go eat with a bunch of girls you see everyday in the bottom of the union (not even a restaurant)
Me:
me neither. i'm pickin' pjs over pearls anytime.
Alani:
yeah or if im going to get all dolled up in a little black dress and be a hottie im at least going where i know someone will buy me drink
Alani:
makes little sense to be all cocktail-ed up and employ a no boys, dry-campus event policy
Alani:
god they all look the same
Me:
i know - isn't it amazing
Alani:
it really really is
Alani:
oh crap they've got a curvier one
Alani:
OMG she might be a size 12
Me:
WOAH!
Alani:
she should get out now, while shes still got her beautiful curves and her identity
Me:
they must feel so... diverse... and good hearted... for taking in a project like that
Alani:
and she's got her OWN legs
Alani:
they all look alike from behind
Alani:
their legs all look the same
Alani:
their fru fru dresses that stop mid-thigh-just above their knee
Alani:
their side ponytails
Me:
i'm surprised their dresses are that long
Alani:
and nasally voices
Alani:
its scary
Alani:
you'd think after a while they'd run out of versions of the same cocktail dress but no. you just change the color and add a different sash or button. and voila!
Me:
it's a good thing the female: male ratio is so skewed that one-night stands are the best anyone could do. i don't know how the guys could be expected to pick a girl out of a lineup the next morning
Alani:
Carrington pointed out that the guys might not know they are sleeping around. You see one drunken night Steven meets this thin cocktail-dress clad blondey-brunette girl whose name is sarah, emily, some variation of catherine, or elizabeth
Alani:
and then meets "her" again the next night
Alani:
and this continues on
Alani:
until one day 15 girls storm up to him
Alani:
saying hey wtf
Alani:
i thought you were dating me
Me:
you know that might be a very good point. the men at carolina might very well be completely innocent (well we'll run with this theory). they could be trying for serial monogomy but the flaw in the sorority system is making it impossible
Alani:
haha
Alani:
oh crap there's a black girl
Alani:
oh damn
Alani:
lemme get back to work before they come seek me out. I'm black and plus-sized!
Me:
no worries
Alani:
but i may offer the diversity card
Me:
i think you are waaay too much diversity for them to ever consider
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